I Got Warned

Only a week earlier, Paul and I were headed back to the forest when I received a call from Drew Shepherd.* He was concerned because he had just driven by the church and had seen several police cars on the property. We hauled back there every second as fast as we could to see what was going on. By the time we arrived, most of the “several” cruisers had departed; still we were greeted by a policeman and a conservation officer.

*Drew throws a Frisbee more precisely than any human I've ever met. Just thought it was worth mentioning.

I approached cautiously, and asked what was going on. I explained that we actually lived back in the forest, and then we were told that maybe it wouldn’t be a real good idea to go back there at that point. Apparently, the police were on a manhunt, and they were hunting a man who had escaped into the woods!

That’s my home!

Neither of the officers had reason to expect that the man was at all armed or dangerous. That was before I informed them that a pair of axes, a machete, and my throwing hatchet were at the campground. That seemed to pique their interest.

Regardless, they set back toward camp to hunt this fugitive from justice. Paul and I were instructed to wait at our cars. Then we had the thought together – what if this dude comes out of the forest while the two cops are inside of it? No time for words to be spoken; sandals and jeans came off. Running shoes and shorts went on. We were going to have to catch this guy ourselves.

It never happened. We didn’t see anything or anyone. About an hour later, the officers came back, reported essentially that they hadn’t caught the guy yet, but that they were leaving for the night. We could do what we wanted.

We stayed in the tent, me, clutching a throwing hatchet.*

*I am actually really good at throwing hatchets. Unfortunately, this has never worked as a pickup line. Yes, I've tried.